Archive for December 2008

Marriage, Movies, and More

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Earlier today I had something to write about. I was at work at the time, but by the time I had loaded up the page to start writing out my blog, I had forgotten what it was. It still doesn’t seem to have come back to me, but let me instead just write down some of the random thoughts I’ve had in the past little while. They are in no particular order, and of no particular importance.

1. Very recently I discovered one of the fundamental rules of city buses. Having spent a fair amount of time on them over the years, I have figured out something very important about them. I’d like to name it Hughes’s Law, but that might already be taken for something that’s actually of relevance to anything. Anyway, the law is this: If you are ever sitting in one of those two-seaters when the bus is reasonably full, the person who sits down next to you will never be attractive in any way, shape, or form. A significant percentage of these people will also smell like old cheese.

2. There seems to be an extraordinary number of people that have gotten engaged recently. I suppose that it’s because my friends and I are getting into that age bracket, but it just seems that everyone has run out and proposed to everyone else. Unfortunately (or perhaps fortunately), that cannot be said of me. Anyway, I am happy for all those that are preparing to tie the…Continue Reading

Upward and Onward

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Well, I think this is it. I think this is the end of the road for me – my stop is coming up and I’m getting off. I don’t know that I can, with any truthfulness, call myself a Christian anymore. How can one be a Christian without believing in Christ? It’s a little difficult. It’s been a journey – a long, arduous one. Emotions have torn me apart, logic has likewise torn my beliefs apart, and now it’s a horrid mess. Yes sir, mess over 11 months in the making is certainly a mess indeed.

But it’s a necessary one. Something inside has compelled me to move forward, in search of truth, despite the fact that everything else within me wants to wake up from the horrible dream and just go back to believing in the nice, comfortable God that I grew up with. I feel a little like a character in the Matrix – it’s comfortable, but if you believe or know it’s a lie, can you really keep living in it and pretend like it’s real? It’s impossible. I must follow the truth, and that’s all there is to it. My emotions will just have to shut up and come along for the ride.

But as I said, the ride is over. I’ve read all I can read, I’ve thought all I can think, and I’ve prayed my little heart out too many times to count. I’ve given God his “last chance” about sixteen times, and each…Continue Reading