I think that it’s safe to say that I have no idea what’s going on in my head anymore. The past few months have been a journey for me, and it has left me stranded in the middle of nowhere – a vast desert of confusion and questioning. In my efforts to perhaps sort it out in my head, as well as inform any readers I may have, I’m attempting to document it here. Maybe it will work. Maybe it won’t. But either way, here it is.
Back in March, I wrote an entry here that talked about my struggles with doubting God and depression, and then my eventual breakthrough from that state. It was a story filled with anxiety and doubts, and it was such a relief when the morning came and the light streamed back into my life for the first time in quite a while. But the truth is that the story has not ended there. Although this relief came for a couple of weeks, unfortunately the doubts still returned to me. Thankfully, they did so without the depression as well, but they still came back. The problem was, I guess, that during my time of searching in order to quell the doubts I had, I came across other information that caused more doubts to spring up, and those were never resolved. So despite a short two-week period of excitement and fresh air, eventually I returned back to earth and still had these doubts to deal…Continue Reading