Last night was pretty interesting. We had a leadership meeting for youth at 4:30 PM, and we discussed a bunch of upcoming events for the next few months, which was good. It was a fairly productive meeting, and so I hope things will go well. After that, the youth had Life Groups. However, instead of doing the material, we watched Kicking and Screaming instead. I actually came up with a spiritual application for it which worked, but mostly it was because there were only a few people there and Kim wasn’t really sure how to apply the lesson to us. It was basically about “healing the wound” that fathers inflict on their sons, but because of the age that we’re at, she was saying that it would be pretty hard to apply it to ourselves. After all, we’re more likely in the process of being wounded rather than being in a position to heal it – last week was talking about the wound, and everyone was having a hard time concentrating on it since it didn’t really seem to apply. Most likely there is a wound there, but we haven’t found it yet, I guess.
Anyways, after watching the movie, some of the people left, but the rest of us discussed where to go. It was Lawrence, Kristen, Kyle, Justine, and me there, and they were talking about going to Wendy’s. Then Kyle asked if I was up for being the fifth wheel and such. I debated it. On the one hand, I was tired and wanted to go to bed, but on the other hand, it was food. And I figured that since they were asking if I wanted to come, they wouldn’t just shut me out and be all exclusive or anything just because it’s two “couples.” So I said to myself, “Bah, what the heck?” and went for it. We went to the Wendy’s in West Brant, and I had to end up waiting forever for my food because the guy in front of me gave them this really weird order that they screwed up. But anyways, we hung out for a while, and things were good. Then I went home, because I was tired, and they went and did something else – I really don’t know what, because, well, I wasn’t there.
This morning, I got up half an hour earlier than usual in order to settle some things. Lately, things have been screwed up in my life – I’m not just talking about the recent breakup with Melissa. I’m not as close to God as I should be or would like to be, and so I felt that it was important to spend some extra time with Him today and sort of settle things with Him. Generally what I like to do is to read my Bible when I wake up, and then after breakfast I have my shower, during which I pray to God. It just works out well since it’s doing two things at once, and since I have really nothing better to do in the shower, I don’t think that God cares too much when I pray, as long as I do it. But today I needed to set aside some time; I just felt that was important. So I prayed for strength and wisdom in the upcoming days, and also just asked Him to help me find who I am. A few months ago, I knew who I was. Then, somehow, I changed, and left myself where I am now, which is not who I want to be. And now I’m struggling to get back to that place where I was – but I know that if I got there once, I can get there again. With a renewed passion, I’m going to spend more time with God and more time in His Word, because I know that the closer I am to God, the closer I am to finding my true identity and who I really am. After all, He made me, so He should know. And so, I’m excited to see where He’s going to take me in new season of my life.
After that time spent alone with just God and me, it was time to face the most challenging task of the day: showering. You see, our water heater broke a couple days ago, and although we had the opportunity to use my Uncle Bruce and Aunt Faye’s shower on Sunday morning, my parents hadn’t arranged anything with them for me today. My mom had suggested heating some water in the kettle and filling up the bathtub with that. I tried it, and it didn’t work. I figured that it would likely be easier to fill up the tub partway with cold water from the tap, and then pour in water from the kettle to warm it up to at least a reasonable temperature. Unfortunately, I didn’t count on just how cold the water was. It was honestly freezing cold. I’m sure that if I had looked hard enough, I could find pieces of ice floating around or something. I gave up quite quickly on the bath idea, and decided that I’d just have to take it like a man and have a cold shower. I pulled out the plug and then got into the tub, standing in the water. My feet nearly fell off, and I’m sure I saw a bluish-purple tinge to them, although that might have been my imagination as I began to lose consciousness due to hypothermia. I ended up having to stand on the side of the tub, just because my feet were so cold just from standing in the water for perhaps ten seconds.
Eventually, the water drained, and I very cautiously turned on the tap again. Standing out of the trajectory of the shower head, I pulled the little knob on the faucet to divert the water to the shower. Then I held out my hand underneath the water, and it fell off, immediately freezing all the blood vessels and cells in my arm, and causing it to crack and disintegrate. It was something close to that, anyway. As I held my hand out, I decided that the most I was going to do was quickly wash my hair so that it wasn’t bedhead, and then get out as swiftly as possible before I died due to temperature shock. I stuck my head under the stream of water, and shivered as the fountain of liquid glacier froze my entire head and neck. I got my head out as quickly as possible, mixed in some shampoo, stuck my head under one more time and rubbed it out, and that was it. That was all I could take. I turned the shower off and jumped out right into the cold air – which right now felt significantly warmer. Honestly, you probably think that I’m exaggerating, but even before I had stuck my head or hand under the shower, I was already shivering. That was, I suppose, just from my feet being in the water. It was cold. And so I dried off as quickly as I could, and that was that. Mission accomplished – sort of. I just made sure to put on lots of deodorant to balance it out.
The rest of the day was fairly normal. I almost feel like some sort of idol in Physics class, and it’s starting to scare me. The two other people that sit at my table, Chris and Khyati, both think I’m some sort of Mensa-qualified genius. And while I must admit that I understand the material and find it pretty easy, it’s also Grade 11 stuff – and I’ve already taken and passed Grade 12 Calculus, so it’s not much of a challenge. Chris always asks me for help instead of the teacher, just because Mr. H tends to just hand out solutions instead of helping people understand. I, on the other hand, am still learning this for the first time, so I can hopefully explain it from a learner’s standpoint. It’s an obstacle almost all teachers face, but I’m not really all that satisfied with how Mr. H handles it. He teaches by example, I suppose, doing up all the practice problems and then printing them out for those that need it. The only problem is that if you don’t understand what the textbook has explained, then his detailed solutions still won’t be of much help. But anyways, I try to do my part to help out where I can – the only thing is that now the people at my table seem to be obsessed with me. Khyati (pronounced “Kathy,” apparently) is obsessed with my car, even though it isn’t mine – I guess that’s because she’s only 16 and can only just have gotten her G1 at best. Things are just getting annoying. I really don’t want all this attention that they’re giving me, but whatever. I just take it, and try not to brag or anything. I’d rather use any abilities I have to help them, rather than just hold it over their heads and say, “Yeah, that’s right; I’m better than you.” Whatever.
Tonight should be pretty interesting. Jordan Smith called me up just a few minutes ago and asked if I wanted to come to his house and play bass with Jeff, Kristy, Angelie, and possibly others. I said sure, that was fine, since I couldn’t think of anything else that I was doing. Then I remembered after I got off the phone with him that I have a worship practice at my church tonight at 8:30 PM. I was going to call him back, but then I figured that it still gave me two hours to play with Jordan and Jeff, and then I wouldn’t even have to go home since I’d already have my bass with me and everything. So it should be interesting – a full night of playing bass, at least.
I think that’s all I have to say for today. Things are still tumultuous within my brain, but stabilizing at least. I can’t really think of any other time when I’ve used the word tumultuous, but it’s a pretty cool word, so I should try using it more often. But yeah, at least things aren’t as busy as they were about a week ago. Otherwise, I think my head would explode from the stress. At least things have calmed down somewhat, so that any unexpected and added stress doesn’t cause an overload in my system. After all, a person can only handle so much stress before they have a nervous breakdown or a violent breakdown or any number of kinds of breakdowns that are possible. But at least stress leads to motivation generally, so that’s one thing to be thankful for. I can be a lazy slob at times, so at least there’s more motivation to keep me going when I’m under stress. But that’s from an optimist’s point of view, and I don’t really like optimists because they told me I need glasses. For those of you who didn’t get the joke in that last sentence, just don’t worry about it…