From Emotions to Exaltation

Disclaimer: This post is from the archives, and may not represent the current views of the author. It also may not be at all interesting to read. Continue at your own peril!

Lately things have been up and down for me. I’ve been experiencing various emotions as I face the reality of going back to school in two days – curiosity, nervousness, and a hint of excitement (though it still is school, you know) take over my system when I think about it. My job is still fairly new to me, and although I’m almost all set and finished training, I’m still adjusting to it and trying to get to know the people there. That produces a whole barrage of emotions as well. The boredom of the job mixed with the feeling of isolation is hard to handle sometimes. I mean, I don’t feel completely by myself there, but I still don’t “fit in” completely. I know that will come with time, but when it’s mixed with uncertainty of what to do on the job sometimes, it becomes frustrating. I guess the main emotion I’m feeling right now is a sense of being uncomfortable. The next little while is going to be a strange time for me, as I get used to my new job and new school, and have little to lean against for support.

It’s in times like this that I learn to trust in God completely. When my surroundings are constantly shifting and being uprooted and replaced, I put my foot on the solid Rock. When my emotions make me unstable and insecure, I put my faith in God’s unchangeable nature. Sometimes the things of this world begin to get me down. I’m continually worn down by the situations around me, like rocks being eroded by water or sand. Sometimes the situations that cause me the most grief are the ones I generate myself. They’re products of my own design, because even though I’m a new creation, the old nature still fights to stay alive. My past habits that I lived with for almost 18 years won’t go away easily, and that causes troubles that I create. And with this mindset, I came into church this morning. I was beaten down by situations I made myself, and felt like just dropping onto the ground and letting myself decompose right then and there. And then worship started. One of the songs was “Hungry,” and the second verse really stood out to me as just what I needed:

Hungry, I come to You, for I know You satisfy
I am empty, but I know Your love does not run dry
And so I wait for You, so I wait for You

I’m falling on my knees
Offering all of me
Jesus, You’re all this heart is living for

Broken, I run to You, for Your arms are open wide
I am weary, but I know Your touch restores my life
And so I wait for You, so I wait for You

The second line of the second verse just rang true with me. “I am weary, but I know Your touch restores my life.” Then another song was sung called “All in All.” I won’t write down the whole song here, but a couple lines really stuck out, so I’ll write out the second verse:

Taking my sin, my cross, my shame
Rising again I bless Your name
You are my all in all
When I fall down, You pick me up
When I am dry, You fill my cup
You are my all in all

As I sat there in the service, I knew I had fallen. I knew I was dry. But I was reminded of where my help and sustenance comes from. God is the one who protects and keeps me, because He loves me no matter what state I’m in. And so, as worship continued, I sang with a renewed passion, because God deserves the best from me after what He did and continues to do for me. If He never gave me another good thing for the rest of my life, and even poured out horrible circumstances on me, He would still be worthy of my worship. He would still be worthy of my unending and undying gratefulness and thankfulness. In fact, even if He had never provided a way for my salvation, He would still be worthy of praise for being God. He is holy and just, and He is always worthy of our worship. But it truly is amazing love that He didn’t stop there. God demonstrated His love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. You see, God is love. He didn’t have to prove that to us, because that’s just what He is. But He went ahead and proved it anyways. His Son’s death is witness to the fact that He loves us, without any effort on our part, since nothing we can do is good enough.

I’m forgiven because You were forsaken
I’m accepted; You were condemned
And I’m alive and well, Your Spirit is within me
Because You died and rose again

Amazing love! How can it be
That You, my King, would die for me?
Amazing love! I know it’s true
And it’s my joy to honour You
In all I do, I honour You

In light of this awesome truth that we can never completely wrap our minds around, nothing else seems as important. I was going to write about work last night, but when you view things from a heavenly perspective, one night really fades out into oblivion when all eternity is stretched out before you. It’s interesting to note that last night, while driving to work, I prayed that God would give me a heavenly perspective, and that I would set my heart and mind on things above, not on earthly things. After all, things up there are much better anyways. So before I start talking about meaningless things that need never be discussed and are better left forgotten to move onto bigger and better things, I’ll stop talking. I’ve got some heavy thinking to do, anyways.

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