Strangeness

Disclaimer: This post is from the archives, and may not represent the current views of the author. It also may not be at all interesting to read. Continue at your own peril!

I don’t feel like writing too much today, so I’ll try and keep this short. I’m not sure why, but I’ve been in a really strange mood today. It’s not a bad mood, and I’m not mad or sad, but I just kept zoning out today for no apparent reason. I mean, I’m a little low on sleep, but I’ve been more alert on other days when I’ve had less sleep, so I don’t know why it’s worse today. I just couldn’t focus very well, and it’s annoying since the workload has piled up in the last little while. I’ve got several things to get done before the end of school, and not much time left to do them in. I brought several things home today to work on over the weekend, and that should take a big load off, but even that’s still not everything. But whatever. I’m not too worried or stressed out; I don’t get stressed out very easily anymore, but rather just sit back and force myself to relax. Sure, I feel the pressure to get things done, but that’s different than freaking out to do it all. I just don’t get that. It’s strange, but whatever. I don’t mind.

Over the past few weeks, and especially the past few days, I’ve been getting so many compliments from people. It’s strange really, although I understand why I’ve been getting them all. I know I’ve changed a lot, and I can see that positive change in myself. I think it’s great. But it’s nothing I’ve done. If anything, people should be complimenting and thanking God for what He’s done, and that He’s finally taken my life over – hopefully for good. It’s great to see this change, and I’m grateful that others can see it too, but I’d like to give all the credit to God. I could never change myself this much, and I know it’s his power that has done all this. He’s really an awesome God, that’s for sure.

Tonight is the June Jam thing at Central. Apparently there’s going to be a whole bunch of churches there and stuff, as well as prizes and everything. It should be pretty fun. Lately, though, I haven’t been too big on worshipping God with singing. I mean, it’s a great thing, but I have a tendency to let my mind wander instead of focusing on what I’m actually singing. I think it’s a lot better when I actually am playing bass as well, because any leftover part of my mind is thinking about playing that, which is also focused on worshipping God, so it’s easier. I still have placed less of an emphasis on singing in my own life, though. I’ve started to thank and praise God through prayer instead, worshipping Him by thanking Him for what He’s done. Now, I’m not going to sit here and say one is better than the other, but for me, it just means a lot more. When I’m praying, I’ve worked hard at forcing myself to stay focused on what I’m praying about. It’s very easy to be distracted during prayer as well, but I find that it’s even easier for me to be distracted when singing. So I place a greater emphasis on my prayer – but collective worship is certainly important as well, so don’t get any wrong ideas about what I’m saying.

I think I’m done for today, though. This is actually quite a short entry for once. Amazing! I didn’t know it could be done! So, once again, with a lack of an interesting and captivating final paragraph, I’m forced to say: This is the end of the entry. Go home. And if you’re already home, well, stay there.

2 responses to “Strangeness”

Meagan

Jeffrey, Jeffrey, Jeffrey – whatever God takes over He makes good – or better.
Yeah, I know what you mean about singing. I sit there and analyze the songs, and then think “Hmm…this isn’t neccessarily true, see..” by which point I just annoy myself too much to sing. I used to write a lot during the singing times ‘cuz it kept me focused..yeah I should do that again. I like reading your stuff by the way, keep it up.
Oh, and I agree with the compliments. I thank God for you.
Meagan

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